Ok, brace yourself. I really have a bee in my bonnet today. And I am going to share. Last Saturday, I stopped at “My Subway” for breakfast. This is the location that I frequent, not necessarily because they are the closest, but because they treat me as a person, and maybe even like a friend. Anyway, the young lady who typically takes care of my sandwich on Saturday morning was working and we started talking about the kind of week we were just finishing. I admitted that mine had been a long one, but that there had been a lot of good in the week. I was more than willing to call it a success. When I asked how her week had been, my Subway buddy told me that she had been forced to deal with a very difficult customer earlier in the week. This customer had actually complimented her on her customer service, and then went on to tell her that based upon the fact that she had piercings, she should not even work in “this part of town.” Really? Why do people have to be like this?
Those of you who know me casually are probably not surprised by the fact that I have no piercings or tattoos. Additionally, it isn't something I ever thought would be a good idea for me. Maybe the pain of the creation is part of what stops me - I don’t know. But I will not judge those who make the decision to turn their bodies into a canvas for self expression. After all, for those of you who know me very well, you know that I spent much of my college years with a pony tail down my back. That was rebellion in its own way in a time when men’s hair fashions had gone back to being shorter. So I say, let others be themselves. What is that ole expression, “Live and let live”? Seems like a good way to proceed to me. And as for my Subway buddy, I glory in her decision to change her appearance through piercings. Good for her if it makes her happy.
Ok, enough of the rant. Let’s get on to the rave. I will begin by telling you that my Aunt Pat passed away this week. Probably not where you thought I would start. She was a great person and I am thankful to have known her and to have been related to her. When my dad died, and later my mom, both she and Uncle Chuck stepped in and supported my sister and me in every way they could possibly find. When you think of what family is supposed to be, Aunt Pat comes to the top of the list for me.
My sister, Jaye, wanted to come back to Iowa for the funeral. She lives in Maine, and the time was short enough that planning was nearly impossible. In searching for reasonable airfare, she had finally reached a point where she decided she wouldn't be able to attend. At this point the person who really deserves recognition entered the picture. She's known him for years because of another lifelong friend and honestly, Jaye thinks of David as part of her family. Before she could make a final decision, David offered to use some of his airline miles to get Jaye to her aunt’s funeral. I cannot even put in words how wonderful this action on his part was. I know that Jaye will try to find the words to say thank you, and she will probably fall short. This is one of the nicest things I have ever known a person to do.
So why can't the world be more like David, and less like the “piercing police”? There are so many times that common courtesy and caring would go so far, and often those attributes are just not present in the time or the situation.
This week a friend sent me an article that really dovetails in what I have been talking about. An author named George Saunders gave a speech (click for the link) to graduates of Syracuse University and he has some incredible things to say. It is a little longer than the things I usually read, but it held my attention all the way to the end. When you are done, ask yourself who the ELLEN is or was in your life. I know that in my case there are actually a couple. I also know that in recent years I have worked to be kinder, but there are still failures of kindness in my background, and probably will be in my future, but I am committed to limiting them. Have a wonderful weekend.
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