With that said, there is one lesson Grandpa taught me over and over that I believe has a place in the world today. Of course with the lesson comes a story.
Much of what we did at Grandma and Grandpa's house revolved around the horse business. Grandpa had always been around horses and was very good with them. We also had a reputation for being able to make progress with horses which others had not been able to do much with. One day we had a horse that didn't much want to be trained. Now, Grandpa had approached this horse just like every other, first getting them used to being around people. Part of this was simply working with the horse, getting them used to human contact, and then adding equipment that came with being ridden and driven. One thing we did was take a burlap sack and run it all over the horse, getting them used to being touched. On this particular day, with this particular horse, things didn't go well. Grandpa had tied the horse's lead rope to the corral fence and proceeded to run the burlap sack over her. All hell broke loose. By the time it was over, Grandpa was on the ground, with a horse on top of him still tied by the lead rope to the fence, She couldn't get her feet under her because her head was being held in the air, and Grandpa could not get out from under her. He called for me, had me untie the lead rope and as she got up, made himself the smallest little ball possible. Somehow, he did not get stepped on. Overall, successful all around. We started the whole process over again, much more carefully this time, and things went much better. She wanted to be a good horse, but she had been scared.
Now, from my vantage point, there was really nothing out of the ordinary here. Things like this just happened. You dealt with them and moved forward.
When we were at dinner that evening, I decided that telling this story of the excitement of the day would be appropriate. I told the entire story with every detail I could muster, even digging down into the emotions I felt when seeing my grandfather under a flailing horse. I remember mentioning that I wondered if this would be the broken ribs for the year, as rarely did we make it through a summer without at least one cracked or broken rib. Fortunately, neither happened. As I finished telling everything I could think of - the whole time watching my grandmother's face grow pale, and not fully understanding why - my grandpa said, "Good god, son. Do you have to tell everything you know?"
In hindsight, this summed up the whole situation. I had been privy to something pretty phenomenal and it was just not possible for me to keep it to myself.
I faced these words from my grandfather at other times in my life. Each time he started, I knew I had done it again - not understanding when it was time to just keep my mouth shut.
These words should resound more and more in the world today. With our ability to instantly communicate, it has become difficult to know exactly what should and should not be communicated. I would venture to say that almost all of us run into a story or a situation we would LOVE to share, but then we consider the people affected by our releasing the story and we determine it would hurt more than it would help.
The problem is that there are many who just don't have that filter, They believe a good story, or even bit of untested information should be immediately released to the entirety of the listening world. Off goes another story on a rampage. We must be the line of first defense in deciding what should and should not be told. I will always lean on Grandpa's words. "Good God, son..." is a good place to start. What litmus test will you use?
